It's Chicks, Amara, But Not as We Know Them
"Well, Oz, I think we have done a good day's work here," Captain Amara
said with a cocky smile. He blew the green smoke from the tetryon gun,
shoved it down into its holster, and looked out over the village.
The settlement looked almost like one of those 20th century tourist-trap
cowboy towns, with shabby western-style houses and dusty streets. At the
end of the long road that ran through the entire insignificant town you
could see the silhouette of a desolate matte painted landscape. There
were a few people, dressed in old-style clothes, who were scattered around
the village, looking a bit confused and lost.
"Indeed captain," Oz answered in a neutral voice. "We have now successfully
crushed their ideological structure and religious belief system." He was
looking at his captain with a motionless expression and clasped his hands
behind his back. "Good thing that you managed to locate and destroy their
"Yes," Amara said. "Now we can impose our Confederation values on them
without any resistance." He looked out over the surroundings. "Well, we
better make sure that everything is in order before we take off and leave
the planet in political havoc." He waved at two ensigns in red sweaters
who were taking scanner readings at some strange equipment. "Jones and...
um... what's your name?"
"Why don't you two go and check out that fishy cave over there," he pointed
to a small opening in a papier-mâché cliff at the farther part of the
town. "Make sure that there are no dangerous monsters hiding there, waiting
to maim unsuspecting townsfolk.”
The two men suddenly looked very nervous. "Um... could we scan it from
"No, dammit!" Amara crossed his arms. "We have to be thorough!"
Rivers swallowed and looked over at Jones. "Well... we better be going
As the ensigns went on their way, cautiously raising their tetryon guns,
Amara turned to Oz again. "I must say that this mission was much easier
than the one on Terrion IV last week."
"Indeed captain," Oz answered. "Those medieval crusade knights were troublesome."
Behind them, a mean-looking crocodile-like alien in some kind of reddish
dress devoured the two ensigns before they could raise the alarm.
"Not as much trouble as that stubborn communist civilization on Gamma
Zenon II, though. They put up a lot of struggle," Amara continued with
a look of distaste. "Clearly an expression of their envy of our freedom
"How's it going, Amara?" a voice asked from behind them. As they turned
they noticed that the rest of the away team had returned from their short
"Not bad, Angel. Not bad." Suddenly Amara noticed that it wasn't just
the away team that was approaching. Behind his team followed a group of
three gorgeous women. They were all dressed in very skimpy gold-colored
dresses that bared their abdomens and most of their legs. Their long,
blonde hair was arranged in elaborate styles and fell over their shoulders
in golden cascades. For some reason they seemed kind of blurry when he
looked at them, but he assumed that it had something to do with the planet's
"Well," Amara said in a husky voice. "I see you guys made friends with
some natives. Good initiative. You know how much I value..." his smile
got wider. "Cultural exchange. Are they humanoids? You know, might be
good to know how they are...built," he asked Angel without taking his
eyes off the women.
"Dammit, Amara!" Angel muttered, looking a bit grumpy. "I'm a space lawyer,
not a gynecologist!"
"Are you the captain?" one of the women said, looking seductively at Amara.
"Well, yes, little lady," he answered, looking at them from under his
lashes. "Captain Amara at your service."
"Oh, but isn't that wonderful?" one of the other beauties said in a silk-smooth
voice. "We get so lonely on this planet, there are no men among these
simple people worthy to keep us company."
"Would you please stay with us for a while?" the third one asked, looking
at him with a coy gaze. "We get so unhappy when we don't have anyone to
"Well," Amara answered, placing his hands on his hips. "Who am I to deny
help to someone in distress?"
He took the hand of the lady in the middle, and brought it to his lips.
"Well, Oz," he said, turning to his first officer, "Why don't you and
the crew get back to the ship. There are clearly needs among the locals
that are yet to be filled. I have full confidence in your command abilities,
so I'm sure that you will do just fine without me for a while. You can
pick me up on the way to the planetary conference next month."
"But, captain, wouldn't they be happier if we brought them to a more highly
civilized planet instead of staying here?" Oz looked skeptical.
"Well, that's not as fun."
Oz raised an eyebrow. "Illogical, captain."
"What's the fun in logic?" Amara grinned before walking away with the
Oz looked at Angel and sighed. "Very well, we should be on our way then."
Angel shook his head and started gathering their equipment.
As they were all packed and ready to go Angel leaned against the shuttlepod
and puffed. He looked out over their small crowd. "Everyone here?"
"Well, I think so," Oz said as he folded up his scanner. "I can't think
of anyone who's missing." As they all got into the shuttlepod and took
off a piece of red cloth tumbled by in the wind, followed by a distant